Question

2012年10月，央视特别调查节目“幸福是什么”爆红网络。最近，你们班也就“幸福是什么”进行了一次讨论，学生们发表了自己的看法，他们认为：

1．幸福来自学校生活，大家一起打球、唱歌、聊天，一起在宽敞明亮的教室里学习，老师同学们相处融洽，学习生活丰富多彩，很幸福；（6分）

2．幸福来自家里。在家里衣食无忧，父母关心他们的生活与健康，很幸福；（5分）

3．有时当他们做错了事，周围的人会帮助他们改正他们感到幸福；（3分）

4．你同意同学们的看法，你认为当你做…．你也会感到幸福；（4分）

要求：1．第四要点的内容需用三到四句话展开合理想象，进行适当发挥。

2．词90左右，开头与结尾已给出，不计入总词数。注意书写和标点符号的规范使用。（2分）

Happiness is for everyone.

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When I think of these things, we realize that happiness is all around us.

 

Answer 1

【答案】

Happiness is for everyone. We had a discussion about what happiness is in our class. Here is what our classmates think.

Happiness is from the school life. They can play basketball, sing and chat with their classmates. And they can also study knowledge in the big and bright classroom. Their teachers are friendly to them all and they get along very well. The school life is so colourful. So they feel happy.

Happiness is from family. They don’t need to worry about their food and clothes. Parents care about their life and health. So they feel happy.

When they make mistakes, people will help them correct them. So they feel happy.

I agree with my classmates. I think when I help others, I will feel happy. When I make progress in my studies, I will feel happy, too. When I think of these things, we realize that happiness is all around us.

【解析】

试题分析：这篇作文要求我们以“幸福是什么”进行一个讨论，将你们班级里关于这个话题讨论的情况叙述出来，并且要发表自己的看法。题目中给出了文章的大体结构和内容，包括同学们的观点和你自己的看法。同学们的讨论中主要有三点：一是幸福来自于学校，为什么在学校里会感觉到幸福；二是幸福来自于家里，又为什么在家里能感觉到幸福；三是当你犯错的时候，会有人帮助你改正，这样也会感到幸福。这三个方面的内容可以分成三段来写，注意按照题目中给出的提纲准确表达。作文的最后，要展开想象，发表自己的看法，在做什么的时候，会感到幸福，要求我们用三到四句话表达。除注意作文的内容之外，还需注意语言的流畅，表达的连贯。

【亮点说明】这是一篇比较优秀的范文。在这篇作文中，作者将班里同学们的观点按照题目的要求完整的表达出来，语言通顺，内容完整，没有遗漏要点。这一部分主要有三层意思，一是在学校里同学们感到幸福；二是从家人那里能感觉到幸福；三是有周围人的帮助，会感到幸福。最后作者发表了自己的看法，与同学们的观点一致，并展开想象，在帮助别人时，在学习进步时，自己会感到幸福。整篇作文的表达还是比较流畅，文章中也出现了一些较好的句式如Here is what our classmates think.、Their teachers are friendly to them all and they get along very well、When I make progress in my studies, I will feel happy, too等。

考点：提纲类作文。