【题目】慈善捐助正在我国流行开来。请用英语写一篇150词左右的文章,就慈善捐助谈谈你的想法,内容要点如下:
1.慈善捐助对受惠人群会有哪些影响;
2.你最想加入的慈善组织是哪一类(助学、济贫、关爱残疾人……),理由是什么。
注意:
1.可参照以上内容适当发挥;
2.作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称;
3.开头已给出,不计入总词数。
Charity is becoming a popular word in China.
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【答案】Charity is becoming a popular word in China
Actively involved in the charitable work, many western billionaires like Zuckerberg have won themselves much praise. Meanwhile, charity in China also enjoys a boom with the perfection of the relevant legal system.
Donors’ unselfishness will make it easier for those in need to access good facilities and resources, making their future change for the better and fostering their sense of positive outlooks. In addition, the receivers will experience a high level of love and care and learn the virtue of being grateful, which will drive them to take responsibility for repaying the society.
Given a chance for charity, I would like to work for the children in the remote areas. Born in the underdeveloped country areas, most of them have to drop out of school due to poverty, leaving their compulsory education uncompleted. Our funding will cover their tuition and living costs, helping their life to get back on track.
【解析】本文是一篇要求讲述慈善捐助的作文,概要已给出,慈善捐助正在我国流行开来,这给考生提供了比较明确的背景。考生需要联系自己平常的所见、所闻和所想,把文章内容写的具体、鲜活并且要有说服力。成文时要注意:首先一定要提到慈善捐助在我国正流行开来,这为接下来的叙述提供背景;接着说慈善捐助对受惠人群的影响;最后说明自己最想加入的慈善组织,并说明理由。注意使用高级词汇和高级句型,以提高文章的档次;注意使用一些连接词,使得文章表达自然、流畅。6.注意文章的字数控制,150单词左右。
本文的亮点:本文要点齐全,布局合理,有效地使用语句间的连接成分,使全文结构紧凑。在文章中运用较为复杂的句子结构。如:句子中含有定语从句,宾语从句等。使用变换多样的句式、许多非谓语结构和一些固定表达方式,这些句式在文章中出现让人刮目相看,成为一个得分的亮点。同时文章里也出现了许多固定搭配和高级词汇和地道的表达,体现了作者对英语语言的驾驭能力。
复杂句:In addition, the receivers will experience a high level of love and care and learn the virtue of being grateful, which will drive them to take responsibility for repaying the society.
定语从句:…earn the virtue of being grateful, which will drive them to take responsibility for repaying the society….
非谓语结构:1. Actively involved in the charitable work…
2 …making their future change for the better and fostering their sense of positive outlooks.
3.Born in the underdeveloped country areas, most of them have to drop out of school due to poverty, leaving their compulsory education uncompleted.
4. Our funding will cover their tuition and living costs, helping their life to get back on track.
5.Donors’ unselfishness will make it easier for those in need to access good facilities and resources, making their future change for the better and fostering their sense of positive outlooks.
其他句式:Given a chance for charity, I would like to work for the children in the remote areas.
…make it easier for those in need to access good facilities and resources
使用了连词: In addition,… Meanwhile…
较多地使用了高级词汇:foster their sense of positive outlooks,get back on track,drop out of school due to poverty,leave their compulsory education uncompleted.,enjoy a boom
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增加:在缺词处加一个漏字符号(∧),并在其下面写出该加的词。
删除:把多余的词用(\)划掉。
修改:在错的词下划一横线,并在该词下面写出修改后的词。
注意:1. 每处错误及其修改均仅限一词;
2. 只允许修改10处,多者(从第11处起)不计分。
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增加:在缺词处加一个漏字符号(∧),并在其下面写出该加的词。
删除:把多余的词用斜线(\)划掉。
修改:在错的词下划一横线,并在该词下面写出修改后的词。
注意: 1. 每处错误及其修改均仅限一词;
2. 只允许修改10处,多者(从第11处起)不计分。
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