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    You often find somebody who works around you complaining(抱怨) all the time, don't you? 1. About 70% of Americans say being around nonstop complainers sometimes has a bad influence on them. Luckily, here are 4 tips to help form positive patterns.

    1．Self?awareness

    When a negative(消极的) thought pops into your mind, immediately correct it. Instead of telling yourself “That's a nice shirt, but I can't afford it，” change the message to “That will look great with my black pants when I can afford it.” 2.

    Of course everyone complains sometimes. But the less frequently you complain, the better you will feel.

    2．Distance yourself

    3. Excuse yourself and go somewhere quiet, somewhere outdoors in the fresh air. Think of something pleasant before returning. You have to take this seriously because negative people can and will pull you into the quicksand.

    3．Don't try to change complainers

    If you find yourself trapped in a group of complainers in a meeting or at a social event, simply choose silence. Let their words bounce off you while you think of something else. Attempting to stop the complaining can make you a target. 4. If someone says, “I hate Mondays; weekends are too short，” try to think, “I'm glad I rested up over the weekend, so I'm ready to make some improvement on that big project.”

    4.5.

    When someone is shouting at you angrily, throw the responsibility back at them by asking, “So what do you intend to do about it？” In most cases, complainers don't really want a solution(解决方法). They just want to speak them out. If you make them aware that they themselves have to find the solutions, they will leave you alone and find someone else to complain to. If so, you will be happy.

    A．Find solutions

    B．Change responsibility

    C．You have got a lot of company.

    D．By doing this, it will lead to positive behaviors.

    E．But you can redirect the discussion in your own mind.

    F．Whenever possible, escape from negative conversations.

    G．You will never know what they are going to talk about.

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