Question

17．目前，大多数高中生选择住校．在寝室里同学们难免会发生一些小摩擦．上周二晚上十点半，张方和李华争吵（张方熬夜学习，李华认为影响睡觉…），你当时在场，帮助解决了他们之间的矛盾．请用英语写一篇关于这件事情的短文．词数：100-120．
你的文章应包括下列要点：
①张方和李华发生争吵      ②你帮助解决矛盾        ③你的看法
注意：①文章的标题和开头已给出（不计入总词数）．
②参考词汇：harmonious   adj．和谐的   dormitory  n．宿舍
Creating a Harmonious Environment
Nowadays，as many students live in the school dormitories，it is hard to avoid quarrels．
     ．

Answer 1

分析 这是一篇提纲类书面表达，文章的要点也基本上都给出来了，但是不是很具体，考生要把要点解释清楚，不能有遗漏．除了表达这些要点以外，还要阐述自己的观点，这就要求考生自己拓展发挥，在写作的过程中，要注意使用高级词汇和高级句型，如强调句，倒装句等，让文章更上档次．同时在列举措施的时候要使用合适的连接词如：First，second，Besides，What's more等，让文章看起来很有条理，也很流畅．本篇文章在写作时不要啰嗦，力求简洁．
【亮点说明】所给范文语言简洁，运用了一些词组和句型：stayed up熬夜，give in 屈服，calm sb．down使…冷静下来，care about关心，made up组成，After all毕竟，Feeling tired，Li Hua went to bed immediately．这句话用了现在分词做状语，But he couldn't fall asleep with lights on．这句话用了with复合结构，He got so angry that he lost his temper，complaining about Zhang's selfishness．这句话用了so…that…从句和现在分词做状语，Whenever we face any problem，we should learn to understand and communicate with each other．这句话用了让步状语从句，Only when we think more for others can we create a harmonious environment．这句话用了倒装句．

解答 Creating a Harmonious Environment
Nowadays，as many students live in the school dormitories，it is hard to avoid quarrels．Last Tuesday Zhang Fang stayed up doing his homework after 10：30 pm in the dormitory．Feeling tired，Li Hua went to bed immediately．（高分句型）But he couldn't fall asleep with lights on．He got so angry that he lost his temper，complaining about Zhang's selfishness．（高分句型）Neither of them would give in and the quarrel continued．
While they were quarreling，I tried to calm them down，saying all of us should care about others．（高分句型）They realized their faults and made up finally．
After all，we share the same school and everyone is part of the big family．Whenever we face any problem，we should learn to understand and communicate with each other．（高分句型）Only when we think more for others can we create a harmonious environment．（高分句型）

点评 应该注意适当增加细节以使行文连贯，比如适当选用表示因果、递进、转折关系的连接词，使文章流畅、通顺，并避免因反复使用句式相同的简单句而造成的单调感．（1）认真审题，确定体裁． （2）构思要点．根据题目要求，理解要表达的要点．设计好文章的层次段落，考虑所用时态、人称等，把要点串联起来，构成文章框架．（3）选词造句，避难选易．（4）认真检查，避免错误．仔细阅读全文，查找是否有错，注意时态、单词拼写、字母大小写、标点是否有误，句式是否正确．逻辑是否一致．