Question

9．ETL International English Summer Camp
Volunteer Wanted
    EIL was founded in Britain in 1936 with the fundamental aim of international understanding"Learn to live together by living together"．
Requirements：Over 16； good knowledge of English； outgoing； working well with children between 7-12
Activities； Language study，outdoor recreation and travel
Campers； Students from different countries
Camp site； Mount Wuyi，Fujian
Time：July 26-August 9
Application deadline； July 15，2014
If interested，please e-mail to info@eiuk．org
假设你是李华，这则广告引起了你的兴趣，请用英文写一封自荐信．要点如下：
1．对夏令营主题的理解；2．根据招聘要求自我介绍；3．参加夏令营的目的．
注意：1．信的开头和结尾已为你写好，不计入总词数；2．词数120左右．
Dear Sir，
      I'm Li Hua from China．                                           
                           
I am looking forward to your early reply．

Answer 1

分析 本书面表达属于书信类文章，要求根据提示信息写一封自荐信．写作时注意以下几点：1、仔细阅读有关提示，弄清试题提供的所有信息，明确有哪些要点．2、提纲是文章的总体框架，要在提纲的范围内进行分析、构思和想象．要依据提示情景或词语，按照一定逻辑关系来写．3、根据要表达的内容确定句子的时态、语态；就本文而言应该用一般现在时态．4．注意使用高级词汇和句式，以增加文章的亮点．
【亮点说明】本文结构紧凑，层次分明．使用了多种句式和短语，比如the aim of表示目的是…..，I think it helpful to learn to live together by living together．这句话用it做形式宾语，避免头轻脚重．It's a good opportunity for sb．to do sth．表示对某人来说做某事是个好机会．Recommend sb．To表示推荐某人做某事．For one thing，for another thing的使用使文章更有层次感，也使语言更加连贯．

解答 Dear Sir，
I'm Li Hua from Fujian，When I was reading the advertisement，the aim of this activity impressed me greatly．（高分句型） I think it helpful to learn to live together by living together．It is a good opportunity for the only child like me to learn to share and work together．（高分句型） Therefore，I recommend myself to you without hesitation．（对夏令营主题的理解）
As a boy of 17，I am outgoing，good at English and have experience of working well with children aged from 7 to 12．（高分句型） I think it is a kind of win-win activity．（自我介绍）For one thing，I can help take care of the children．For another thing，I can improve my English，make more friends，and enrich my life during the summer vacation．（高分句型）（参加夏令营的目的）I am looking forward to your early reply．
Yours Sincerely，
Li Hua

点评 应该注意适当增加细节以使行文连贯，比如适当选用表示因果、递进、转折关系的连接词，使文章流畅、通顺，并避免因反复使用句式相同的简单句而造成的单调感．（1）认真审题，确定体裁． （2）构思要点．根据题目要求，理解要表达的要点．设计好文章的层次段落，考虑所用时态、人称等，把要点串联起来，构成文章框架．（3）选词造句，避难选易．（4）认真检查，避免错误．仔细阅读全文，查找是否有错，注意时态、单词拼写、字母大小写、标点是否有误，句式是否正确．逻辑是否一致．