We’re always being sent contributions（稿件） for our popular laughter, The Best Medicine Section. Some of the jokes are obvious winners. Some of the jokes are ancient,  which are unfit for public consumption or just don’t make the grade（符合要求）. And then there are the rest: the jokes that get our editor scratching his chin and wondering, “Is this one good enough to print? ” Now you can help him choose. We’ve picked five jokes from the “Maybe” pile. Vote for the one you think is the best. The top-rated joke as of July 20, 2012 will be published in the magazine—and net its author $150.

(1)

A boy goes to a bookshop with his birthday money and chooses a book titled Advice to Young Mothers. “Why would you want this book? ” the assistant asks him.

“Because I collect moths（飞蛾）. ” the boy explains.

Derek Blew, Lane Cove, NSW

(2)

Father: “So you want to be my son-in-law? ”

Young man: “Actually I don’t, but I want to marry your daughter and I don’t see how I can avoid it. ”

Kimberley McEwan, southland, NZ

(3)

How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb（灯泡）?

None. They only promised they would do it.

Lisa Bluthal, Umina Beach, NSW

(4)

A couple of country boys driving a semitrailer（半拖车） down the highway come to a bridge with a sign saying: “Clearance 3. 1 metres. ” They stop, take out a tape measure and find the truck is 3. 5 metres high. “I don’t see any police around, ” one says. “Let’s go for it. ”

Loretta Fonseca, Otago, NZ

(5)

There are only two people who really know how to run this country. Sadly, one is cutting hair and the other is driving a taxi.

James White, Belmont, NSW

Click here for Poll Archives（投票档案）.

71. The writer’s purpose in writing the passage is to________ .

A. ask readers to judge which joke is the best

B. provide readers with some jokes for entertainment

C. collect contributions for a magazine

D. show us laughter is the best medicine

72. What do the underlined words (in the first paragraph) mean?

A. Jokes which are obvious winners.

B. Jokes which don’t make the grade.

C. Laughter and The Best Medicine Section.

D. Jokes that the editor isn’t sure of printing.

73. We can learn from the first joke that________ .

A. the book is very popular with readers

B. the assistant is very embarrassed

C. the boy misunderstands the title of the book

D. the boy wants to buy the book for his mother

74. What can we infer from the jokes?

A. The young man doesn’t want to marry the girl. (Joke 2)

B. Politicians seldom keep their promises. (Joke 3)

C. The boys often break traffic rules. (Joke 4)

D. People in that country live a happy life. (Joke 5)

75. The passage can most probably be found________ .

A. on the Internet                                                    B. in a newspaper

C. in a story book                                                    D. in a magazine

Madame Curie ,the youngest of five children ,was born in Warsaw ,Poland in 1867. Marie Curie's maiden name was Manya. Her parents were teachers,and she learned the importance of education at an early age. No higher education was offered to women in Poland at that time,so Manya took a job as a governess(女家庭教师). She sent part of her income to Paris to help pay for her older sister's medical studies. Her sister qualified as a doctor and married a fellow doctor in 1891. Manya went to join them in Paris ,changing her name to Marie. She entered the Sorbonne(now the Universities of Paris)and studied physics and mathematics, graduating at the top of her class. For the research she wanted to do , she was introduced to another young scientist, Pierre Curie. Later they fell in love with each other . After their marriage, they worked together on radioactivity.

 Fame troubled Marie Curie and also her husband, because science was their world and in this world of science fame and honor to persons had no value. One day when a writer for a newspaper tried to ask Marie about herself and her thoughts and her beliefs, she answered him, “In science we must be interested in things,not in persons.” Much of the real character and spirit of this unusual woman was found in these few words,which she was later often to repeat. One evening, at a big party,a friend asked if she would like to meet the King of Greece,who was also a guest.She answered in her simple manner, “I don't see the value of it.” Then,seeing that she had hurt the feelings of her friend, she quickly added, “But …but…of course,I shall do whatever you please. Just as you please.”

What did Marie Curie once do to help pay for her older sister's medical studies?

A.She was a teacher.                   B.She was a doctor.

C.She was a governess.                 D.She was a waitress.

What was valuable to Marie Curie?

A.science and research.               B.fame and honor.

C.character and spirit.               D.persons and things.

The writer for a newspaper was interested in____.

A.things       B.Marie Curie          C.Marie's husband          D.persons

What do you think might have happened between Marie Curie and the King of Greece?

A.The King was angry with Marie Curie.

B.For the sake of her friend Marie Curie met the King of Greece.

C.The King of Greece wrote a letter to invite Marie Curie to meet him.

D.Marie Curie held another party for the King.

Not too long after I had begun to drive as a teenager, someone pulled out of a parking lot onto the road in front of me. I reacted   36  and pulled up very close behind her--- just to show my irritation(怒气) and let her know she didn't "just   37   with that!" We've all been there with      38   incidents and reactions. My mother was with me, and told me to turn into the   39  parking lot. Safely there, she asked me why I   40   that lady had pulled out in front of me purposely.   41   rude, power play--- I guessed. Mom said that maybe she had just had some bad   42  , maybe she was late picking up her child and was distracted(分心). Think of all the   43   of why someone does something like that. It's usually not on purpose--- but what I do as a reaction is on purpose. She always said that I   44   to think about the other side before I   45  . Usually the reaction causes more of a   46  .

I am in my fifties now, and to this day, that has always   47   my head whenever those   48   happen. I've   49   my children the same thing. We often see and hear about "road rage." No matter to what   50    that "rage" is taken, my children will say something like, "They need Grandma's words!" As adults, I don't see them react as most of us do   51   their first reaction is always anger and irritation --- they   52   it and   53   what the other person's problem might be. Even if the other driver really might be   54   or doing a "power play," no more   55  reactions will occur because of their irritation.

1... A. calmly	B. quickly	C. angrily	D. carefully
2.. A. get up	B. get away	C. get down	D. get along
3.. A. similar	B. terrible	C. rude	D. familiar
4.. A. first	B. farthest	C. last	D. nearest
5.. A. suggested	B. complained	C. thought	D. concluded
6..A. Always	B. Just	C. Almost	D. Still
7..A. impression	B. grades	C. skill	D. news
8.. A. lessons	B. purposes	C. possibilities	D. reasons
9..A. used	B. needed	C. preferred	D. reminded
10..A. decide	B. drive	C. react	D. do
11..A. problem	B. threat	C. mess	D. result
12.. A. happened to	B. came across	C. passed by	D. flashed through
13..A. accidents	B. incidents	C. affairs	D. quarrels
14..A. noticed	B. given	C. taught	D. passed
15..A. degree	B. measure	C. step	D. action
16.. A. as soon as	B. in case	C. as though	D. even though
17..A. get	B. set	C. make	D. catch
18..A. question	B. wonder	C. forget	D. know
19... A. troublesome	B. polite	C. rude	D. warm
20..A. casual	B. dangerous	C. amazing	D. cautious

 

I’m not so sure I like my friends any more. I used to like them-to be honest. We’d have lunch, talk on the phone or exchange emails, and they all seemed normal enough. But then came Face Book, and I was introduced to a sad fact: many of my friends have dark sides that they had kept from me.

   Today my friends show off the more unpleasant aspects of their personalities via FaceBook. No longer hidden, they’re thrown in my face like TV commercials -unavoidable and endless advertisements for the worst of their personalities.

   Take Fred. If you were to have lunch with him, you’d find him warm, and self-effacing（谦逊的）.Read his FaceBook and you’ll realize he’s an unbearable, food-obsessed boring man. He’d pause to have a cup of coffee on his way to save a drowning man-and then write about it.

   Take Andy. You won’t find a smarter CEO anywhere, but now he’s a CEO without a company to run. So he plays Mafia Wars on FaceBook. He’s doing well-level 731. Thanks to FaceBook, I know he’s playing about 18 hours a day. Andy, you’ve run four companies-and this is how you spend your downtime? What happned to golf?What happened to getting another job?

   Take Liz. She is positive that the flu vaccine will kill us all and that we should avoid it. And then comes Chris who likes to post at least 20 times a day on every website he can find, so I get to read his thoughts twice, once on FaceBook and once on Twitter.

   In real life, I don’t see these sides of people. Face to face, my friends show me their best. They’re nice, smart people. But face to FaceBook, my friends is like a blind date which goes horribly wrong.

I’m left with a dilemma. Who is my real friend?Is it the Liz I have lunch with or the anti-vaccine madman on FaceBook? Is it the Fred I can grab a sandwich with or the Fred who weeps if he’s at a party and the wine isn’t up to his standard?

1. Who is opposed to the flu vaccine in the text?

A. Fred      B. Andy              C. Liz          D. Chris

2.What’s Andy probably busy in doing now?

A. He’s running his company

B. He’s playing golf all day

C. He’s looking for another job

D. He’s playing computer games

3.According to the text, FaceBook tends to _______.

A. present another side of people

B. offer some foods for free

C. show endless advertisements

D. get you to more parties

4.The text is developed mainly by _____.

A. giving examples                       B. following the time order

C. listing figures                            D. raising questions

 

In New Britain, Connecticut, a new official in charge of schools named Kelt Cooper wants to end high truancy (逃学) rates among public school students, and he’s suggesting financial punishments to get job done. A plan to fine students up to $75 for each day they skip school is now being considered by New Britain authorities.
The concept of fining kids for skipping school may come as a shock, but it’s not new. In Ohio, the parents responsible for a student guilty of habitual truancy can be fined up to $500 and/or be required to perform up to 70 hours of community service. Until recently, students in Los Angeles could be hit with a $250 punishment for each count of truancy; in early 2012 the law was changed and the heavy fines were removed, though a $20 punishment may still be handed out if a student truants for the third time.
Fines for truancy are also in effect overseas. In the UK, The Guardian reports, parents can be fined ￡50 (about $80) per skipped school day. The punishment doubles if it’s not paid within 28 days.
The question is: Do fines like this work? The vast majority of authorities in the UK said that, indeed, they do. The fines were believed either “very successful” or “fairly successful” by 79% in reducing truancy, according to a survey.
If the plan is passed in Connecticut, it’s unclear how effective the law might be, how to make parents and students obey the law and what might happen if they refuse to pay. However, local officials seem to be willing to give it a shot. According to the Hartford Courant:
“The mayor agrees that truancy is a real issue in New Britain schools, and what’s been done in the past hasn’t been working to reduce truancy.” said Phil Sherwood, assistant to Mayor Timothy O’ Brien.
And what do the students think? In the New Britain Herald, one 17-year-old entering her senior year called the plan “ridiculous” and predicted that the punishments will bring about negative effects on the court system. Besides, “I don’t see the point,” she said. “Kids will just try harder not to get caught.”
【小题1】 The passage mainly discusses whether __________.

A．schools have the right to punish students

B．authorities should consider protecting kids

C．students should be fined for skipping school

D．parents are responsible for children’s truancy

【小题2】 If a British kid skips two school days and fails to pay fines in a month, the punishment will be __________.

A．two hundred pounds	B．fifty pounds
C．eighty pounds	D．a hundred pounds

【小题3】 We can learn from the passage that ___________.

A．truancy is a serious problem in New Britain

B．Cooper’s plan has been passed in Connecticut

C．fining kids for truancy is a new idea in America

D．little has been done to reduce truancy in New Britain

【小题4】 The underlined part “give it a shot” most probably means _____________.

A．get used to it	B．help improve it
C．try to carry it out	D．fight against it